find me there.

http://sleeppeacefully.livejournal.com/

maybe im ready to heal. im ready to feel.

pretty rainbow on the kitchen table 730am in the morning.

you were once everything that mattered to me. it took me long enough to pick myself up and get ready to heal. the pain is still there, but im pretty much used to it already. heartache is not the only pain that is going through now. its only now that i mange to pull up all the courage to blog about all this shit.

everyday in class is a dread. i literally had to drag myself out of bed to go to school. maybe im not used to rp lifestyle yet. although this is my 2nd year already. blending in together with the crowd was never my forte. and now i struggling agn, but im glad that there are still a couple of peeps around that us there to support me.

i miss the peeps in e37g much. i miss walking into e37g everyday hearing the pple scream and laugh their heads off. they are the bunch of pple that is really there to brighten up your day. school is never the same without them.

i cant do this.

its really funny how life and fate plays with us humans. the 3 heart wrenching months that i had with you. i cant say that it is all bad, i had my share of love as well. but from the beginning it was never meant to be, i held on even on knowing that things might just end the way it is now. it was just a matter of who is gna do it first. and well i did. it took me long enough to feel the break up hangover. the pain was torturous. somebody help me let this go.

more than my own life.

my life has become more of a evil routine. school, work and home.

shit shit and more shit happening. things just falls one by one. idk what to do. fuck. yeah yeah i can already see how many pple out there will laugh their fucking head off when i fall. who gives a shit.

my social life seems to be coming to an end. time slipping away from my hands, the routine of drinking at least twice a week seems more like a mundane task now. i miss the heart to heart talks although even single one of us is drunk like some ass. the hungover the other day, was the only evidence that every single night we spend together is real.

school.

i miss the peeps in e37 so much even thou we are meeting everyday bfore, lunch and after sch. year 2 aint as easy as it seems. sch starts at 915 and yer i cant seem to wake up on time even with nicole calling me every morning. im still thinking whether i should get a place in nafa, rp still dont seem like a place for me. hmmmm maybe i should throw in my portfolio and see what the response is.

3rd.

school has started. why the fuck am i in dhhm!! i can tahan all the dress codes and all. but the contents of the module that im taking is freaking annoying. boring and dry shit. i cant wait to end this 15 weeks of extreme routine.

baby is the only person that made my day on the first day of school. drop by workplace after he came back from sailing. im dumbest asshole on earth. holding on to smth that i might never get a single shit out of it.

back to black.

back from the dearest e37g chalet.

for the photos theyre up everywhere on fb.

this is like so damnnnn prettyyyy righttttt.